My last post ever about I Was A Cub Scout.

Written by Todd on their break-up:

I thought today maybe just maybe, i may write my part, my view, my overall thoughts on the break up of my once slightly popular within certain circles band i was a cub scout.

I have read countless messages, posts, blogs, emails etc.. about it all.

When not one of these people, apart from a said member of the band has any knowledge of what actually caused our split.

lets start kind of near the end.. but il mix it up

William Bowerman is a nice guy, he is good to his friends, his family, his fans and generally and genuinally most of the people he meets. I have alot of respect for him, he is a great drummer and a decent person.

This is not to say that i myself like him in anyway at all anymore.

It was decided that we would call it a day just after a show we had played in london at camden dingwalls. Another show with at least 150 people then last time we played there, another reason as to shit was shit.

i had just got off the phone to my girlfriend and spoken to her about alot of the shit that had been going on. I had explained to her how i did not want to be apart of this project anymore, i felt it had run its course quite badley.

Our managers wanted us to stay in london till the morning for some sort of meeting. I in my usual foul mood asked around everyone and called as many people necassery to make sure this didnt happen. I wanted to go home and sleep on my own floor and drink my own blackcurrent and didnt want have to spend anymore time in camden.

The 'meeting' was on straight after the phone call/ ass kissing in the venue. We were basically told that our good friends at xl did not wish to take us on for our second record, due to many things all explained vaguelly. Il try not to be to vague.

first off we were not making xl much money at all, we were not to the same standards of adele, jack penate or vampire weekend. in fact we thrived on the fact we had nothing in common with most of the bands on that label. but yeah we were not big sellers. we didnt were day glo, we didnt like grime, we were not from london/ urban in anyway, we were not the arctic monkeys, we were not the ting tings and we were not really that interesting.

Our obvious lack of partnership/ friendship never went down well with alot of people. I wrote all the parts for our songs, which William then drummed to as obviously selfish as it sounds. This is how it had always been since day one and how i wished for it to continue. I once said this to William and i believe it was a bit of a burn for him. There was alot of conflict between us even on the smallest of matters but i believed in something and went with it, i still believe in that now.

Towards the end i stopped considering him as a member of this project, as i believe he did to. In my opinion he was absorbed in his own little world where he believed he was god. The king of drums maybe. I think for any fan of our music it was easily distinguishable who was the rock star and who was himself. I could take many more petty digs as he can to.

I tried not to include myself in alot of what being in a band is suposedly meant to entail. I dont enjoy interviews, photo shoots, video shoots and so on. I feel no gratification in talking about myself, seeing photos of myself and watching videos of myself. Where is William was very much the opposite to all of this and would bask in the glory of everything i was a cub scout, it was his dream to do this.

I have always had my own idea of how i would like to set about things, but it was very hard to do it in that environment.

Over the years since we were together we grew more and more apart. At one point we both disagreed strongly towards what was going on in area to do with drugs. It became quite apparent that i know longer shared that belief. but I am not as you may think a heroin addict. This was a problem for William as he felt alot of his friends had gone to shit, but for him to even mention my so called addictions really annoys me. I feel strongly that my problems are my problems and nobody elses.

We also didnt see eye to eye on the main thing. That being the music. in the final 3 months or so as a band William had said to me that since the release of the first pink squares single, he had not been enjoying what the music was all about. This was an instant blow for me, i quickly came to the asumption that in no way where we doing this for the same reasons. William said he wanted to play cute music, i didnt and found that pretty shit.

i love music i listen to lots of it, but i guess our influences were confused alot of the time, even between us both. but we never tried to sound like these bands, we just did haha.

William was very millitant in what he would like. probably the most notable being russian circles. Ive never had anyone that i truelly idolize so i found it kind of odd to see such admiration in one individual.

i found towards the end many people surounding us and us ourselves had become very spineless and pretty twofaced about alot of things. one person would tell another one thing and another person may not even know about it at all.

I was a cub scout helped me meet some of the best people in the world, some of my now nearest and dearest. The years which i spent within that band where easily the best of my life, i dropped out of college and lived like a gypsie which was amazing.

In the end there is alot more that could be said, but in my opinion you shouldnt care.

I hope this brings up some sort of feeling any feeling.

nobody asked for my opinion on it, but this is it. i hope you can understand my side of it, even though it may not be completely clear.